Wake up to every sunrise

Living a much simpler life in a much warmer climate. This is what I dream of lately. Going back to 40 hours a week or less. Living the regular person life would be like being semi retired. I've come to this conclusion after seeing how technology is advancing us in every way but destroying us personally. Kids no longer knowing how to entertain themselves. Losing part of what defines them as one grows. Why do we resort so often to using the television, ipad, iphone, computer, video games to raise our children. Instead of showing concern we just pump them full of chemicals to counteract apparent learning disabilities. Removing natural selection because we are no longer raising things naturally. '

One more year of being north of where I want to be.
One more year of working hours upon hours.
After this I want to work half the year.
Go somewhere warm and relax.
Be debt free and enjoy the world.


Stay on track, Stay focused, Stay positive...

As the wind shifts...

I miss the silence that I once felt. There was a destination that made me concerned of less people and more place. I enjoyed the air, the present. I enjoyed. Now it's back to that feeling...

I hope to capture the wind that creates beauty in the waves

As life continues to pass I begin to cherish parts of this world more and more. What could be consider to some unimportant I try to look at in a different light. Not dwelling on the past or looking to the future, but being present. The fleeting eye contact with a stranger, the sincere smile from a friend. How spending an hour with someone can have such an impact on your day. Seeing the raw beauty when you actually are able to hold eye contact and not just blush and look away. To actually enjoy the depths of the sea of blue/green/brown or whatever color one sees their eyes. To look past the screen that captivates so many and actually see the the sky for what it is. Listening to waves crash and feeling the wind against my skin. Embracing the chill of the ocean as it tackles skin and pushes through. To feel weak in the seas and still try to embrace the ocean. Watching sunsets and praying the sunrise the next day will be just as beautiful. Even if you can't see the light through the fog there will always be light through the fog. There will always be another sunset. Temperatures will rise and thermostats will fall. Regardless of how you feel I wish this world would be our constant. I wish that the ocean will always have life and that we move on to greener pastures. To not destroy but embrace this planet. We are becoming parasites in a world where mutual-ism is the only answer.

...But home is nowhere

Beginning to strive forward. Setting and achieving goals and finding new passions. The intricacies of life. Of living. What purpose do we have but to explore this world we are slowly condemning. How long to we have left to explore? Why do we keep using archaic fuels to function when it is completely possible to move forward. Is it greed or the idea that we can just fix what we are causing? That maybe earth itself will somehow restore homeostasis once it gets to a tipping point. I have moved beyond Oilfield work presently, after many depressing days in the northern world and many disappointing interactions with a less than satisfactory company, I have moved forward. Granted they had the last straw by "laying me off" after I gave my two weeks notice and not "Wanting my fucking respect". I had lost much faith in this human race. But upon moving to Nanaimo I have met many pleasant people. Visited places were the quality of trust and respect and any redeeming human quality has been rediscovered. Maybe it's the ocean, the mountains, the beauty of everything that is this world makes a person just overall less shitty. Regardless life is good and I leave whoever reads this with one of my favorite poems from the AFI track on their album "Sing the Sorrow". Its the final song "...But home is nowhere". Enjoy we held hands on the last night on earth. our mouths filled with dust, we kissed in the fields and under trees, screaming like dogs, bleeding dark into the leaves. it was empty on the edge of town but we knew everyone floated along the bottom of the river. so we walked through the waste where the road curved into the sea and the shattered seasons lay, and the bitter smell of burning was on you like a disease. In our cancer of passion you said, 'Death is a midnight runner.' the sky had come crashing down like the news of an intimate suicide. we picked up the shards and formed them into shapes of stars that wore like an antique wedding dress. the echos of the past broke the hearts of the unborn as the ferris wheel silently slowed to a stop. the few insects skittered away in hopes of a better past time. I kissed you at the apex of the maelstrom and asked If you would accompany me in a quick fall, but you made realize that my ticket wasn't good for two. I rode alone. you said 'The cinders are falling like snow.' there is Poetry in despair, and we sang with unrivaled beauty, bitter elegies of savagery and eloquence. of blue and grey. strange, we ran down desperate streets and carved our names in the flesh of the city. the sun has stagnated somewhere beyond the rim of the horizon and the darkness is a mystery of curves and lines. still, we lay under the emptiness and drifted slowly outward, and somewhere in the wilderness we found salvation scratched into the earth like a message.

Never doesn't even begin to describe my misunderstanding

Occasionally with moments of reflection I am still at a loss. This path gives time for lots of thinking.

What will become of the truth when we keep it in

That moment when you let go, when you release what has happened. You realize the past is the past and it is dead. It's freeing look back and use what you need to and move on. That moment when you understand that it was never meant to work. Never meant to be. No need to dwell and wonder. Push forward and remember who you are. Always hold onto that, evolve and proceed and keep your core, your values, your you. This is me, and this is me moving forward.

Once upon a time sleep welcomed me

I knew at that moment that I sincerely missed time with you. In the small mountain town listening to an up and coming indie band I wished for nothing more than to be sharing a winter ale with you. The crisp mountain air, a slight taste of wood burning stoves. An open sky with every star begging for something more. In my mind... You understood. Yet I could not help but insist the moon or the stars could fill this void, to replace my love with lunar amity. The waking seconds henceforth could not explain why I continue to think about it. Clouds below the sky, islands in the superior lakes, immortal and infinite and always stuck on you. I once was open, I once loved, I once lost, and now I am... As if writing would be the cure to vanquish these thoughts, I continue to digress, shamelessly releasing feelings I'm much too late on expressing. Alas they are felt and this paper shall shed no tears.

I've been through the rockies...

Racing through connections, reflecting off the beautiful eastern lakes and talented sunrises/sets and through out it all I cannot understand why it's always your playlist that I enjoy the most during these moments. The songs you suggested would be cute to listen to and finally reaching their true beauty at 10000 feet. Sending smiles through my gaze as strangers curiously wonder. I truly would love to share more and hope at some point we will be able to.

Why can't I feel anything from anyone other than you.

It's so hard to describe how it feels but when it happens you somehow knew this was what it was going to come to. Yet no amount of foreshadowing or preparation makes you feel less. Feeling as if you should pass the blame, constantly dissecting everything you may of done or somehow didn't do. The discussions that you thought would work themselves out continue to stack up until someone decides it is just not worth it. There are no mistakes, just lessons. However much the lessons hurt just hope that the next time you figure it out. When you discover the person that you are willing to sacrifice everything for, make sure she is willing to sacrifice for you.

Knowledge breeds desire...

When every aspect seems perfect sometimes it just is so much more easy to run away. Despite how it all developed it was so close. Closer than ever. Yet in the end we pushed away. Fighting fate or whatever other term could represent an outside force bringing it together. Bringing us together. And when the comforts fell and the end came, we somehow decided we could just be. My brain is riddled and plagued with confusion and I no longer feel that opening up will be beneficial to anyone. This was it. Growing starts here. I thought I knew who I was and what I wanted. I no longer feel I know anything. This was it. It's just not my thing... North of anywhere I want to be...

And spring turns to summer...

It's difficult to perceive how different people react to different things, what may not bother one may mean the world to the other. Actions and Reactions shape the world and build and destroy. If only it was easier to react appropriately for every situation. If every reaction was perfect would the world be an easier place to be in? Or would it just be a bland environment with little emotion? Emotions themselves are difficult, there is no easy way to comprehend how someone is feeling nor do most people express themselves well. I myself have huge difficulties in expressing everything that is on my mind. When I do express I tend to be nervous of the reactions to what I say. learning to express...

Kamehameha III

Kona, Hawaii. Such a beautiful place to be. Sitting on my patio listening to the first Jack's Mannequin album, thinking on how well it goes with the ocean atmosphere. Life is good. Today is a day of relaxing after a 15 hour day yesterday with many hikes up waterfalls and to volcanoes it is a good day to just watch the storm creep in from Hilo. It's amazing on how such a small island can have such diverse climates depending on weather you are east or west, south to north. No idea what to write. Being near a lava spill into the ocean, hearing the waves crash against the island edge and seeing the stars light up like never before. Such a great moment. Always push on even when others turn back. You never know what you might discover about yourself and where you are headed.

High tides and further spirits.

It's hard to learn until you lose. Regardless of what it is, sports, life, love. To realize that you cannot go back. That person is never coming around. The sun has set and the past is settled. Regrets can kill. In this over connected digital world does anyone still want privacy? The new mechanisms for raising children, the death of somewhere, the birth of someone. Making everything public to anyone at anytime. It's a wonder that anyone maintains some sort of sanity. Where are minds were once filled with clandestine thoughts now we are programmed to be concerned with people who would of normally fallen out of our lives. At what point do you release your grip and let go of this struggling world. Releasing the digital world and starting back in the analog glory days.

step 1. Remove all networking devices from phone.

Step 2. Realize the irony of keeping a blog

Montego Bay

So I probably should be writing more considering I have been in school for the last 7 weeks however I just did not have the writing vibes. Only 5 more days in Grande Prairie then I am on the road to Edmonton, Calgary, Saskatoon, Montego Bay, Fox Creek, Kelowna and Revelstoke only to end up back in Grande Prairie for Jan 3rd. One more session of school up in Grande Prairie, then good bye. Ideally its back to Kelowna and working up north in ft mac. Oh and maybe a little Hawaii trip with my family in March too. Jumping back to present tense for a second though. I have been trying to gain weight, eating more than I usually do and its not easy. New supplements as well have turned my night life into hell. Apparently my body needs to adjust to the amount of creatine in it? Not that my night life has been exciting before, nor will it be exciting if I figure out what is causing this. In any case in the time I have written my last blog I have attempted to date and failed miserably, Its just not easy living up here. Maybe one day I will be able to get out there and have a normal lifestyle. Experience the 51% of females I can assume make up part of the 7 billion people we have on this earth. For now though, I am just as comfortable alone as I have ever been. Its how it is and always has been. Of course when I say alone I mean a sufficient amount of friends to get by with. They keep me level and always let me know there is love out there coming my way. Despite my lack of being able to express myself it is always appreciate.



Anyways I need to go understand electricity...

In Death and Life

If you value life never waste time, for time is what life is made up of. I read this the other day and could not agree more. So many things in this world I take for granted when in reality I should just appreciate them more. The human body is the greatest thing to appreciate, without it you would be lost but with it you can become all powerful. Yet some people still believe that filling it fill of toxins and not keeping it in top shape is the best way to live their life. What benefit is there to ruining the only body you will ever have. I guarantee that anyone who purchases a fancy sports car goes out of their way to give it he proper maintenance and fuel it requires. Why then, does the body that you are given, not get the same attention? Afterall it was your body that allowed you to work enough to get this sports car. It was your body that allows you to get to the fast food place and eat junk food. Without it you would be nothing, with it your potential is unlimited.

Think about it

This is northern electrician worker 1452 signing out

And when the sun breaks...

And on my last day off the sun comes out! How beautiful. I cannot understand how customer service skills still evade some companies. If a repair on a vehicle is estimated to take two hours and it takes 4 times as long as quoted and there was not any complications, it just doesn't make sense. If something is going to take longer than quoted please call and inform the person waiting for the vehicle. Also despite what you may believe when someone leaves you a message asking you to return their call you should return that call. /endrant

Hale storm? Maelstrom?

Oh how depressing my writing is sometimes. Despite what I may write I am not at all in a sour/foul/depressed state. There is no other place in this world I need to be right now than where I am, otherwise I would not be here. Every action and choice I make is my own conscience decision. Nothing in this life just happens. Somehow, at some state, you are aware of what you are doing. There is no sense playing the victim, I just write to write. Sure sometimes I think back to my training days in Kelowna, the good times working at lululemon with some amazing girls and guys, I remember the joy and entertainment that was limitless. However, I know that the future holds much much more of this, and I am aware that the options in Kelowna are limited. With knowing this and after a couple setbacks I made the decision to move up here, I also made the decision to get out of sales and training. I also made the decision to travel and work and live the life that I live. I write so that others may understand the options available. That despite how rundown you may feel, or how "stuck" you are, you aren't. Nothing in this world can hold you down if you don't want it to. Friends will always be friends and family will always be family. A friend lost was never a friend had.

Anyways as I write this I am drinking a beer in the dark enjoying the storm, listening to "at the birds foot (vocal)" by Dallas Green (City & Color... get it?) I suggest you do the same...


This is July 8th, at the wake of the storm

Right above it

As I sit in the broken down apartment Billy and I are renting presently I can't help but appreciate more and more. Making the decision not to get internet, have cable and to continue to live in a place that daily gets worse and worse it really makes you open your eyes. Before this apartment I would take clean water for granted, now I appreciate my water when it is slightly brown, odourless and clear. Being in complete contact with everyone all the time was just the norm, now I am thrilled if a 5 minute call doesn't drop or fade in and out. Between the pealing paint, holes in walls, bugs showing up in unwanted spots and knives that were pre "hotted" I get more and more excited for my time in not only Grande Prairie but Kelowna as well. I could not miss longboarding to the beach, watching movies, doing yoga, or any recreational activity that is not work. Now all I have is this computer and the gym to keep me sane. There truly is nothing better then spending time with people who you can just be around. Nothing has to be said or done and people don't even have to move and you can just appreciate their presence. Or they can ask you to do ridiculous things with less than a moments pause for you to agree to whatever idea they just came up with.

The things I miss…


And each and every time I return to these places and hang out with those people it makes it harder and harder to return to "Vegas". Its all for the dollar. Its all for my future. This future where I build relationships over technology and not over good old fashion coffee dates, or walks along the beach. This dollar seems like it loses its worth every time I write. To sacrifice so much for a number, a digital increment that all in all means nothing. It will do nothing for me, yet I feel as if I must complete this journey… questing to finish my "five year". The countdown to better things in life.

Another endlessly sunny evening, sometime in June, from somewhere north of where I want my life to be.

The life of a traveling electrician pt 1

The Life of a Traveling Electrician

From Grande Prairie, High Prairie, Dawson Creek or Fox Creek. Lloydminster and Ft MacMurry, The black gold rush has taken me everywhere. Panning for gold, metaphorically of course, and hunting the almighty dollar. It never shocks me what people will do for money, what always shocks me is what people do WITH their hard earn dollars. I never realized how people could put value on a high, basically cancelling out living in a desolate area but never being sober enough to realize where they are. The trade off of course is making insane paycheques, however they remain in the same spot forever because of the counter production of it all. Any advice to anyone seeking quick cash and a successful life is to not get caught up in the drinks, drugs and of course, hoes. A lot of the time it seems like too many people are trying to live a repetitive rap song. In any case enough rambling… My life… Fox Vegas is where I am presently living, with Billy, my roommate since forever. We travel the lands in search of money. All of this may sounds great, but what are the repercussions you ask if you do not get tied up in any of the aforementioned problems? Relationships… Building relationships with people who seem cancerous to your well being and sacrificing relationships with people that should be a major part of your life. You begin to realize that the ones that let you work to stay in their lives are the important people who you should hold on to forever. Whether its a text ever so often or a phone call, Facebook or Skype, you begin to cherish every ounce of human connection with the people back home that are fading away. So with the realization that I, nor anyone, should be alone forever you set up a "5 year plan", and of course this plan consist of making mad dough and falling in love (fairytale right?). Again a problem arises, in order for one to fall in love they must somehow build a relationship with someone awesome, to properly swoon them of course. See the dilemma? Make money, sacrifice life and location, equals less quality people, equals less quality relationships, which brings us not only to a run on sentence but also the the very shocking fact that it will be very difficult to promote the creation of this "love" thing. Things weren't always this complicated you know, once upon a time life was as simple as go to school, get good grades, girls are alright but I'd rather know every poke'mon ever created and ride my bike with my friends. Oh how life changes, or societies opinion of what you can do that is socially accepted and deems you successful changes. Yet still we decide to plug away and live it. Live every stormy day in June when you swear that if the sun doesn't come out you are giving up. Live when your landlord evicts you because he is having a bad day and can't deal with the stress. Someone said that these are just experiences to be cherished and learn from. That each and every time "shit happens" you rise up from this shit and learn how to prevent it from happening again. At the very least coping with it better than melting down and crying for hours in the shower… or whatever.


Anyways because of my lack of internet in this quant town I will be uploading blogs in mass amounts, this is sometime in June, from somewhere north of where I want to be… stay tuned

When I call you up so we can shoot the moon...

Ah days off, 15 days in Fox Creek, AB. It certainly makes you appreciate what time you have not at work. Somehow being surrounded by vulgar Neanderthals makes you realize how gifted you are in this life. The experience, skills, intelligence, everything that now defines me sets me apart. I am not meant to be in construction forever. So setting goals and having like minded friends seem to be the most important factor to keeping me on track. To anyone that is stuck in a rut right now, remember that life goes on. Moments and memories are great but they are just that. In order to fully succeed in life you need to discover who you are, although taking time and effort, in the grand scheme of it all you will be a better person. Be thankful for who has come and gone in your life. Take what experiences you have received from these people and if they cause you pain and suffering or depression and disease, move on. Learn from everything, evolve constantly.